Patience

This is my fourth week at home. The first two I took voluntarily to make sure I am in the best shape possible for the critical implantation phase. The last two was ordered by the doctor since the spotting/bleeding lasted a bit longer than I was hoping for.

The days were long (I think I have exhausted the things you can do while staying on bed rest), and the fatigue from doing nothing also has been frustrating (why I am tired all the time when all I am doing is resting?).

I anxiously await the next doctor's appointment to see the baby's heartbeat on the monitor to ensure that everything is okay, yet I also know there are multiple challenges down the line. It's like a video game that you are trying to pass the multiple levels before you win the grand prize - The positive pregnancy test was merely the first level, then heartbeat on the 7th week, then the various tests/screening along the way, until you have a healthy baby in your arms, there are so much to be worried about (and quite frankly, probably even more to worry after the baby is born).

Parenthood will probably be the best training for patience I will get. Ultimately, no one but God knows what stands ahead of each day, and I need to learn for the patience and the peace to live each day without worrying. For what will be will be, and we can only live life the fullest by doing what we can and letting go what we cannot control.